The Chinese state news agency Xinhua published an English-language rap video on Monday promoting the country’s “two sessions” – an annual meeting of China’s top lawmakers and political advisers.
The music video, which was composed and performed by Chinese rapper Su Han, depicted the “two sessions” as an opportunity to showcase China’s strengths.
“See we’ve got ‘two sessions,’ let me show you Chinese manners. Tramp the bygone cession we’re the fortitude presence [sic],” the lyrics go.
The clip also included snapshots of China’s recent achievements, including its moon lander, poverty alleviation efforts and the Sunway TaihuLight supercomputer.
Lyrically dense and often grammatically questionable, parts of the ditty verge on the incomprehensible.
“It’s like a summertime paradise, likewise butterflies in twilight. See the Larch rolling miles upon miles, when we meet satisfied Popeye,” one line goes.
“Never gonna be the earth invader forcing it into hunt in Cretaceous. Gotta be the Ready One Player when in front of dirty polluter,” read another. “Eject all the rapaciousness like shaking off nephrolithiasis.”
Nephrolithiasis, also known as kidney stones, is a disease that affects the urinal tract.
‘Better than expected’
On Twitter, the “two sessions” rap video was greeted with some eye-rolling, as well as some genuine surprise.
“Fasten your seatbelts and watch China’s latest burst of raw, undiluted soft power,” wrote Adrian Zenz, a scholar who researches China’s re-education camps in Xinjiang.
The “Two Sessions” — dual Communist Party confabs — have started in China. So naturally there’s a rap song — featuring lunar rovers, submersible vehicles, and cloned monkeys — to celebrate. Happy Monday! https://t.co/tyKDdn1tLx pic.twitter.com/taN087GDkR
— Anna Fifield (@annafifield) March 3, 2019
This is much better quality than I’d expect from a Two Sessions rap song made by Xinhua 🤣
— William Nee (@williamnee) March 3, 2019
Stunning work. But I don’t think you just shake off kidney stones
— Austin Ramzy (@austinramzy) March 4, 2019
‘Huawei the Beautiful’
Last week, Chinese social media was aflutter at “Huawei the Beautiful,” a music video where a group of children sing praises for the tech company’s products.
“Which is the most beautiful phone in the world? Everyone says Huawei!” sang the children.
“The battery is durable and the appearance is good, with the most precious Chinese chip! Ranking first in the phone world, Huawei strives for innovation!”
The video was made by Zhoudan Kids’ Singing Classroom, a Zhuhai-based production company. Huawei had since issued a statement distancing the company from the video, though it thanked its fans for their support.
In recent years, Chinese state media has produced a steady output of propaganda songs, which are primarily shared on social media. A 2017 Xinhua video titled Another Day in China unironically chronicled the lives of expats in China.
Also in that year, to commemorate the 20th anniversary of Hong Kong’s transfer of sovereignty, Chinese state media outlet Xinhua produced a new track praising the city’s “One Country, Two Systems” policy of autonomy.
